Do you have conversations with yourselves in your head.
Do you think what to say and how to the person you are going to meet soon.
Do you sometimes remind yourselves to do various tasks, like taking the child to a checkup or sending an important email.
If you answered yes, you are functioning daily with an inner monologue.
The inner monologue is the result of certain brain mechanisms that cause us to hear ourselves speaking and having a conversation in our head without uttering a sound.
It helps us process experiences and thoughts, find solutions to different problems, prepare for meaningful conversations, regulate emotions, gain perspective, motivate ourselves to act and more.
In the past the assumption was that all of us have an inner voice, but in the nineties of the previous century Professor discovered that only 30 to 50 percent of us have an inner monologue.
The good news is that even if you do not have an active inner monologue, you can teach yourselves to do it.
Here are several ways that will help you find this voice and manage with yourselves a helpful and positive inner monologue.
Slow down
The intensive routine and lack of time do not leave much space for the inner voice to appear and have a dialogue with you about the events of the day.
From time to time try to slow the pace and give yourselves time to process the events of the day with the inner voice.
Practice active listening
Active listening means lack of judgment and quieting the urge to respond while another person is speaking.
When we practice listening to others, we develop at the same time the ability to listen to our inner voice and the directions of thought it wants to offer us.
Learn to spend time with yourselves
Give yourselves opportunities to be with yourselves without distractions.
For example go out for a walk in nature.
Do not force the inner voice to have a conversation with you.
Create the conditions and it will appear.
Try to accept and love yourselves unconditionally
Know your strengths and weaknesses deeply.
Self awareness is an important skill that will help you manage the inner voice better, especially when it brings you negative messages.
Practice meditation
Meditation is one of the best tools for controlling the inner dialogue.
Dozens of thousands of thoughts pass through an average person’s mind every day and quieting the mental noise creates conditions for a calm and quiet inner dialogue that can offer newdirections of thought.
Meditation also contributes to cultivating self awareness and allows us to pay attention to the interpretation of the inner voice and its contents.
Actively avoid the negative inner voice
From our ancient ancestors we learned to search for dangers at every moment, but over time the mind went too far and started searching for negative everywhere.
One reason is the negativity bias, a real tendency to notice negative more easily than positive. Stay away from negativity as much as possible and do not cooperate with negative talk.
Allow the inner dialogue to lead you to positive and tolerant talk.
Practice respectful speech and impeccable behavior
Your speech and behavior are natural results of your inner voice and this also works in the opposite direction.
When you choose to behave impeccably and speak respectfully, the inner voice becomes more positive and refined.
Impeccable behavior means avoiding anything that may hurt others.
Recognize the good
Gratitude is a powerful mental state that can create a real change in the inner landscape.
When we place our attention on the things we can be grateful for, we make space for the good inner voice and weaken the negative voice.
Pay attention to your physical and mental health
The more you give your body and mind their basic needs like balanced nutrition, physical activity, emotional support and a supportive environment, the easier it will be to notice the difference between the good inner voice and the bad one and manage it properly.
The parable of the wolves
An ancient parable tells of two wolves inside each of us, a black wolf and a white wolf. The black wolf represents the bad voice within us, which includes anger, hatred, jealousy, criticism and fear. The white wolf represents the good voice that includes love, compassion, giving and brotherhood.
The parable shows the choice we have, which wolf to believe. The more we choose the white wolf, the easier the choice becomes and the less effort it requires.