Parents are relieved to know that their immense stress regarding childrearing is being acknowledged: The U.S. surgeon general has recently issued a notice on the mental health and well-being of parents. It’s evident that raising children in the age of social media increases stress, especially for mothers with young kids. In my role as an exercise physiologist and health researcher, my goal is to encourage mothers to move and understand the value of physical activity while practicing self-compassion. I realize that while exercise can boost mental health, it can also become an extra burden in an already packed schedule.
Mothers often face endless to-do lists, so expecting them to follow a traditional exercise routine involving travel to a gym for a 30 to 60-minute workout isn’t practical. Yet, social media is filled with other mothers showcasing their fitness routines and pre-baby bodies. Experts in behavioral medicine have observed that typical exercise plans — which involve structured, intense workouts over a period of time — might discourage those who can’t fit self-care into their busy lives. This is particularly true for mothers who juggle household chores, intensive parenting, and work outside the home, all while dealing with a significant mental load. With the rise in time spent with children over recent years and limited support, it’s no surprise that mental health, and physical activity in particular, is suffering.
A study from 2020 indicated that 39 percent of working mothers in the U.S. didn’t engage in any vigorous activity throughout the week. Yet, those who managed to maintain regular physical activity reported a better quality of life. So, how do we encourage physical activity to enhance mothers’ mental well-being without adding more tasks to their list? From my research with new mothers, it’s clear that those who try to follow more rigid exercise plans often end up abandoning them, as unexpected events like a child’s illness, work deadlines, or extracurricular activities can disrupt even the best-laid plans. In a recent study, my team and I focused on getting mothers to exercise according to their own readiness levels. This helps prevent exercise from becoming another burden that their bodies can’t manage. One participant mentioned, “I’m obviously not feeling so great, so I’m not going to push myself to do anything too intense…it kind of gives you permission to focus on yourself and recover, which is nice.”
In a previous study, we offered new mothers a structured online exercise program. Participants found it difficult to stick to the plan and felt like they were failing. “At the end of the day I thought, yeah, no, I’m not doing this video, I’m going to bed. So it made me feel…I wasn’t enough…I should have done it; I should have pushed myself more. It was a love-hate relationship with it.” Flexible approaches seem to work better for mothers trying to maintain physical activity, given the challenges of sticking to strict programs. ‘Exercise snacks,’ or short bursts of activity throughout the day, have become popular for achieving health benefits. The outdated “no pain, no gain” mindset has shifted towards promoting enjoyable exercise. Allowing individuals to choose how hard they push themselves during exercise, instead of setting a specific intensity, increases overall participation. Green exercise, or being active in nature, also seems more enjoyable and should be considered to improve adherence.
As a full-time working mom of two young children without nearby support, my exercise routine has changed significantly in recent years. I’ve managed to fit in yoga at the office before picking up my kids, run or walk around baseball fields during sports seasons, and lift weights in the backyard while my children play. It might not be perfect, but it’s effective, and I feel better for it.